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The Rath of Reum (Based on a true story) On a brisk Tuesday morning Joseph had just clocked in for his shift. Joseph was a skilled router possibly one of the best in his whole department or at least he had thought he was. Little did he know his world was about to be turned upside down. Someone or something would soon slither their way into the mind of young Joseph and make him question everything he thought he knew about routing and communication with the field. And that something’s name was…Benjamin Reum (lightning cracks). Joseph started his morning by opening the almighty oracle and while doing this he heard the notification of an incoming email which he had assumed was the daily quota schedule. He was right. With great excitement he opened the schedule, but that excitement soon changed to a sinister dread when he saw that he was unfortunately assigned midillinois. Joseph knew of the foul beasts that lurked in this area and before he even had a chance to shriek in sheer terror pain and agony, he was bombarded by three hundred consecutive messages from Benjamin Reum. He thought what kind of monster would disrespect a worker right when they clock on by sending them so many messages? Wide-eyed he realized he was dealing with a creature so dangerous that they had assumed themselves to take priority over anything and everything else. Sickening. Vile. Utterly atrocious. Joseph pondered if the beast was sitting at his computer with messages already typed out so that he could instantly begin the torture of the poor soul that was stuck with him for the day? Before Joseph could even answer his pondering, Benjamin Reum messaged him one thousand more times with idiotic requests. A few hours had passed, and Joseph was still balancing his tasks of taking calls, routing jobs in the pools and responding to Benjamin Reum. He found it strange that Benjamin Reum could send messages at a rate greater than all his other supervisors combined. Regardless, he was doing a decent job of appeasing the beast and strongly felt that he would be able to complete this forsaken task of covering Benjamin Reum’s area. But then an abrupt series of bings from his IM shattered his train of thought. Shakily and fearing for his sanity he clicked to see who had messaged him. No doubt, the creature Benjamin Reum had emerged from the moist unsettling shadows of Microsoft teams and asked the eager but willing Joseph to do ten thousand more things. These requests pierced young Joseph like a ton of missiles falling from the heavens. The only thing was…in midillinois…where Benjamin Reum lurks to destroy-…there can’t be any place even close to resembling a heaven. Joseph gasped for air and tried to type back but his vision was blurred by the relentless and unforgiving number of messages sent by the despicable Benjamin Reum. In a desperate attempt for salvation Joseph attempted to swiftly status to ‘at lunch’ and clock out. He was famished, drained, and exhausted from soul sucking Benjamin Reum. He had managed to pull off a one-hour break from the wrath of the Reum. For now, Joseph rested. The clock struck 4:45 and young Joseph was a weak, broken router at this point. His wrist cramped as he wearily clicked back and forth between Oracle and his messages with Benjamin Reum in a frail attempt to keep up. Joseph had the heart and perseverance of fifty quota reps combined but tragically this was not going to be enough to conquer an animal so self-entitled and demanding. Joseph had bid it not possible to be this annoying and unforgiving towards an innocent router, but Benjamin Reum had shattered and spat upon his perceptions of reality. The room in which young Joseph sat began spinning and he soon fell from his super expensive chair that he certainly didn’t buy from Walmart. He hit the floor as an elegant guiltless robin slams a cold clear window. He was dead. The sound of Reum’s messages had gone completely silent. The whole room was completely still and if the walls could talk they’d ask what happened to the clicks and clatters of Joseph’s keyboard and mouse. Tears fell as the unacknowledged workers paid their respects to the router that gave his life to try and silence an unstoppable force of annoyance. Let us not forget his sacrifice. They say that whoever is given midillinois is told this urban legend. The truly unsettling fact of the matter is that people deny there has ever been a field supervisor named Benjamin Reum. But if that were true how could stories like this exist? How could a nonexistent supervisor gain such a strong dominating reputation for being the most annoying person to ever have access to a messenger application? Choose to believe what you want and if you’re feeling daring…just go ahead and open your Oracle link. Click down into Lincoln, Midillinois, and directly under the manager Darin Dean,...you can then rub your eyes and take a look at whos listed below…then ask yourself if the tale of Benjamin Reum exists. I know I can see the haunting name that has claimed so many honest routers ... perhaps its just a glitch in the system...or its simply....Benjamin Reum?