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No like I get it, you guys don’t want to invite me but like it still makes me sad. I would want to make tik tolks and buy teddy bears with you guys, but at the same time I wouldn’t want Jolie to be there. Just like you guys wouldn’t want me there. It doesn’t make sense though, why would you make a big friend group if only you guys were going to hang out together. I don’t think this is even a friend group at this point. It’s literally just you guys and the rest of us sitting back and watching you. It feels Amazing to be invited but when you're not you feel like shit. You’re just left there thinking what went wrong. Idk if this is going to last much longer. Like at this rate I don't even know. Like I love you guys, but you treat the rest of us like shit. Even my old friend group would invite all of us if we were hanging out. And it’s fine if it’s only like once or twice. But like fuck you guys. It’s constantly happening and you don’t give a fuck. And neither do I but I do. I thought you guys were different, I thought you guys were my friends. But clearly you don’t give 2 shits about me or my feelings. When I first joined this friend group I noticed a couple red flags but I just shrugged them off and said nothing. I am starting to regret that now. I should have listened to my gut. You guys are bitches and could care less about me, Jolie, or grace. The sad part is, I hear you guys talking shit about Jolie and grace behind their backs… so it leaves me to wonder what you say behind my back. Fuck off man. I act like I don’t care. But I do. I really do care. And I have been constantly let down by you guys. I tried to give you another chance, but that turned into multiple chances. Which is not fair to me. Fuck you guys. You're all fake. I thought you guys were civil. But the way you treat the rest of us… I’d be surprised if me and Grace don’t commit before Christmas. I deserve better than the fucking shit you guys give me on a daily basis. I was to Vulnerable to you guys. I thought I could trust you. But guess what, I was wrong. I’m not just going to sit waiting on you guys just to be left out. It leaves me to wonder if Ellie was right. You are actually Making me want to. Oh and Ava, she was right by not forgiving you. You guys should have just told us from the beginning that you didn’t like us, then we wouldn’t have wasted our time with you. We deserve better bitches. I got better plans. i'll just get so fit and popular that you'll have no chance to run back to me. You'll wish you were me, just like I wish I were you right now. - August 8th 2021 I'm scared. I'm scared because they have calendars together. I'm scared because they always hang out without me. I'm scared because we might not be in the same class. I'm scared because transferring is scary. Iḿ scared that you guys will leave me. I'm scared that I will be dropped. I'm scared because I'm lonely. I'm scared because I feel replaceable. I'm scared that I will be ghosted. I'm scared because I can't trust you guys fully. I'm scared because I can't be completely honest. I'm scared because Iḿ left out. I'm scared because I can't stand up for myself. I'm scared because you have group chats without me. I'm scared because you like her more. I'm scared because my mom knows your names. I'm scared because my mom is asking. I'm scared because I'm your backup. I'm scared because I'm not your first choice. I'm scared because I am attached. I'm scared that I'm invested. I'm scared because you guys might hurt me. I'm scared I will be left alone. I'm scared because I've opened up to you. I'm scared because I'm ready and you're not. I'm scared because you've let me down. I'm scared because I like you too much. I'm scared because I feel connected to you. I'm scared because you know too much. I'm scared because you already have someone. I'm scared because I'm jealous. I'm scared because I have no one else. I'm scared because you have stuffed animals together. I'm scared because they have a tik tok account. I'm scared because I overthink.-august 11th 10:29pm See the day when I stopped looking for your instal and started looking for there’s changed me. The day when I found out you like to exclude changed me. The day I found you were fake changed me. The day I found out you were my favourite changed me. The day you stopped being my favourite changed me. The day we went to the mall changed me. The day you added me back on house party changed me. The day I decided I wanted to be your friend changed me. The day you banged into a pole changed me. The day you said no to me on my birthday changed me. The day that I walked alone changed me. The day you started to act like a bitch changed me. The day you changed personality types changed me. The day we weren’t in the same class changed me. The day when you tried to drop me changed me. The day when you were quite changed. The day when I texted you crying for help changed me. The day that you didn’t respond changed me. The day that we sat on the road changed me. The day that my parents realized changed me. The day where I got no sleep changed me. The day when all I had left was my dog changed me. The day when I walked alone changed me. The day when my thoughts were uncontrollable changed me. The day when I hoped you would join the call changed me. The day when I hoped you wouldn’t join the call changed me. The day we spent 12 hours together changed me. The day when you choose her over me changed me. The day when you left changed me.